Thank you to all my (gay) friends and (gay) family members here on Facebook. Not one of you has unfriended me for trying to find a unity in love, and even though you don’t agree with me, you did not openly criticize me or delete me.

A few of you reached out to thank me for sharing my stance in a loving way, and even were so bold to like my status, not because you agree with my stance on the policy, but because you love me as a person. A few of you even let me hurt for you, and give you my heart felt condolences. You let me cry for you, and you believed me, when I told you I am sorry for your pain, I love you, and I am here for you.

Not one of you made me feel bad for being me (Mormon), and some of you were even willing to discuss with me other theories of the policy. You and your loved ones are the ones who are most affected, and yet out of the hundreds of you, that are friends with me on Facebook, you did not personally judge me or openly criticize me, for being me (Mormon).

I believe that most of us see the world as this, made up of people, not Church’s, Gays, Blacks, Whites, Democrats, Republicans, Jews, Jokes, Woman, Men, and so on. You can actually believe in something that has certain laws or rules, and not view the world like that.

I am friends with you and love you, because of the person you are, not because of your attractions.

You truly know the extent of exclusion. You have proved to be some of the most loving and strong people I know. I am sorry for your pain, and I am thankful that you can accept me even though I believe differently than you.

Also I hate calling you gay, I wish I could just call you friend, but in order to try to make people understand that I do have sympathy for you. I have to remind them that I do have (gay) friends. Some of my (Straight) friends don’t think I love you, or feel for you, because I have found an understanding of the conflict this policy is trying to prevent.

I want my (gay)FRIENDS to know this.

I love you so much, I love you so unconditionally and if you do not believe it, let me show you. Don’t let anyone tell you, I don’t, because I am Mormon. I am trying to understand and respect my Leaders, because I have vowed to do so.

Love is not shown through our beliefs, love is shown through our actions towards each other. I am (not a very good) member of my Church and it does have a lot of exclusions, that is why I am not very good at it.

You don’t know this but every time I see you, you greet me with love, hugs and energy. Some people great me with love, some with hugs, some with energy, but you are the only ones that do all three. You make me feel special, and I appreciate you. Thank you!

I also feel that there is something deeper behind this policy, like protection from mean or abusive people. I feel like they are giving us an explanation, but there is something larger behind it, like a vision or more, the word protect keeps coming to my mind. These are just feelings not facts.

Sometimes children are excluded from things not because we are not wanting them to not have what we do, but because we are protecting them from harm. I don’t know why but I cannot stop thinking that they are excluding them, because the pain of the exclusion is more manageable to deal with, than the pain without.

I want you to be honest with me right now I want your feed back, I don’t want my (straight) friends speaking for you. I believe this gospel to be true with all my heart it brings me pure happiness and joy. I don’t like how it has made me feel sometimes with being excluded or judged, but that is usually because of my actions.

I love my leaders with all my heart, just like I love you. Do you believe that is possible? Do you believe it is OK for me to love everyone? I do, I even love the people that hate me, and that don’t want to be friends with me, because I am Mormon. Sometimes I feel like they are doing to me, what you may feel is being done to you, by my Church. I would never expect you to not like them, for them not liking me.

I know these people are trying to protect you, stand up for you, and watch out for you and your children. I will take their resistance to me as a person, and their hatred because that is their choice and freedom. We all have choices and desires, and things that bring us joy and happiness. I want you to be happy!

What I want to know from you is this: If I change who I am and I give up my religion or belief, will that make you feel better about yourself and this situation? If me letting go of something that brings me joy, will give you joy, I will do it. Will that make you stay my friend? If it does, then I will do it. You know I would do it, but you would never ask that from me. You want the same for me, that I want for you! That is why we are friends, because we find joy when we see each others joy.

I don’t want to lose anymore friends over understanding this policy, the leaders of the Church, and my Gospel. I feel the tables are turning and sometimes I feel that the world accepts you being Gay, but not me being Mormon(pro policy). After this week, I also feel like some friends come with a price? I use to feel that, in this Church. That if I was good they would like me, but I realized I did that to myself. I now feel that I have to go against my church so people won’t unfriend me, but people of love would not expect me to disagree with it. You stayed friends with me and that makes me feel good, for sharing my perspective, and I thank you for that.

Just for fun and because I know you can take a joke, here you go.

I have also committed apostasy in defense of you! My immediate response was to defend you, until I learned more, and realized it was not meant to hurt even though it does.

Screenshot 2015-11-08 16.59.46

Screenshot 2015-11-08 15.29.30

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